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Positivity Preaching: Why You’re Doing It Wrong

October 25, 2019

There’s a trend I noticed when scrolling through Pinterest looking for quotes to use on my latest project:

Inspirational quotes are frequently laced with a stab at others.

Now that I’ve said it, I bet you’ll notice it a lot more!

Take these for example…

  • “Your life isn’t yours if you always care what others think”
  • “Don’t let anyone ever dull your sparkle”
  • “Never apologize for having high standards. People who really want to be in your life will rise up to meet them.”
  • “People will throw stones at you, don’t throw them back, collect them and build an empire”

While the messages are definitely noteworthy, I’m constantly seen these kinds of words spread around the internet as a way of taking a swipe at people.

Think of the statuses we’re almost all guilty of making at the inception of Facebook. “Jan Smith is rising above the drama.” Sure, Jan. Are you really rising above the drama when it’s consuming you so much that it’s all you can post about?

The problem (or perk, whichever way you look at it) with the internet is that everything is in writing. At a certain point everyone around Jan will notice the frequency of victimhood and brushing off blame and think that the positivity isn’t quite there after all.

Here are a few productive ways of channeling inspiration and positivity in a genuine light.

Drop Negative Words

Instead of starting a sentence with “don’t” or “never,” talk about what you do want to happen. “I will have a great day! I’m going to finish my entire task list! I’ll love with my whole heart today!”

Criticism Who?

Stop comparing yourself to others, whether in a positive or negative light. You are your own person. Worry about yourself.

Learn From Experiences

Do you find yourself in the same unfortunate situation over and over? Change it! Do not dwell on what got you there or how you feel about it. A friend of mine got a speeding ticket and took it as an opportunity to feel grateful that she has the means to pay for it. Then she decided to do better and watch her speed in the future. Life is one big teachable moment.

Seek Therapy

If you can’t get beyond the negative thoughts and frequently turn to the internet or others to share your distaste, find a therapist and make an appointment. Don’t air your dirty laundry online or treat friends and family like a dumping ground. Therapists do a world of good and having a healthy relationship with your mind is serious business.

Sarabeth, The February Fox

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